Jack Vettriano pincer MovementJack Vettriano Picnic PartyJack Vettriano Only the deepest Red II
welcome.
Ridcully saw a tall, curly‑headed young man clutching what looked like an undernourished guitar or possibly a banjo that had been used in a fight. Beside him was a dwarf, holding a battle horn. At the rear was a troll, hammer in each paw, seated behind a pile of rocks. And to one side was the Librarian, standing in front of . . . Ridcully leaned forward . . . what having exhausted him, he started to play.
It was a simple little rhythm, one that you might easily have ignored if you'd met it in the street. It was followed by a sequence of crashing chords and then, Ridcully realized, it hadn't been followed by the chords, because the rhythm was there all the time. Which was impossible. No guitar could be played like that.
The dwarf blew a sequence of notes on the horn. The troll picked up the beat. The Librarian brought both hands down upon the piano keyboard, apparently at random.
Ridcully had never heard such a din.appeared to be the skeleton of a piano, balanced on some beer‑kegs.The boy looked paralysed by the attention.He said: 'Hello ... er ... Ankh‑Morpork.And, this amount of conversation apparently
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
Jean Francois Millet The sower
Jean Francois Millet The sowerJean Francois Millet SpringJean Francois Millet Man with a hoeLorenzo Lotto Venus and Cupid
a daft idea.' The raven looked around at the stricken battlefield, empty now except for the fallen and the flocks of his fellow ravens. 'What a waste,' he added. ' I mean, just look at it all. Such a terrible waste.'
'Yes!'
'I mean, I'm near bursting and there's hundreds of 'em untouched. I think I'll see if I can have a doggy bag.'
'They're dead bodies!'
'Right!'
'What are you 'Convergent evolution,' said the raven. 'Often happens. I read once where apparently the common octopus has an eye almost exactly the same as the human eyeb– caw!'
'You were going to say something like: except for the taste, weren't you?' said Susan.
'Negger grossed by bind,' said the raven indistinctly.
'Sure?'
'Leg go ogg by beak glease?'eating?''It's all right,' said the raven, backing away. 'There's enough for everyone.''That's disgusting!''I didn't kill 'em,' it said.Susan gave up.'She looked a lot like Iron Lily,' she said, as they walked back to the patient horse. 'Our gym mistress. Sounded like her, too.' She imagined the warbling Valkyries pounding across the sky. Get some warrior, you bunch of fainting blossoms . . .
a daft idea.' The raven looked around at the stricken battlefield, empty now except for the fallen and the flocks of his fellow ravens. 'What a waste,' he added. ' I mean, just look at it all. Such a terrible waste.'
'Yes!'
'I mean, I'm near bursting and there's hundreds of 'em untouched. I think I'll see if I can have a doggy bag.'
'They're dead bodies!'
'Right!'
'What are you 'Convergent evolution,' said the raven. 'Often happens. I read once where apparently the common octopus has an eye almost exactly the same as the human eyeb– caw!'
'You were going to say something like: except for the taste, weren't you?' said Susan.
'Negger grossed by bind,' said the raven indistinctly.
'Sure?'
'Leg go ogg by beak glease?'eating?''It's all right,' said the raven, backing away. 'There's enough for everyone.''That's disgusting!''I didn't kill 'em,' it said.Susan gave up.'She looked a lot like Iron Lily,' she said, as they walked back to the patient horse. 'Our gym mistress. Sounded like her, too.' She imagined the warbling Valkyries pounding across the sky. Get some warrior, you bunch of fainting blossoms . . .
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Rudolf Ernst The Perfume Maker
Rudolf Ernst The Perfume MakerAlexandre Cabanel Fallen AngelAlexandre Cabanel Cleopatra Testing Poisons on Condemned PrisonersJulien Dupre Shepherdess With Her Flock
you've learned a lot from Cap— Commander Vimes, captain.'
'Sir. My father always said I was a quick learner, sir.'
'Perhaps the think again.' Carrot brightened up. 'It's a bit like being a guard, really. When you need us, you really need us. And when you don't . . . well, best if we just walk around the streets and shout All's Well. Providing all is well, of course.'
'Captain Carrot,' said Lord Vetinari, 'because we understand one another so well, and I think we do understand one another . . . there is something I'd like to show you. Come this way.'
He led the way into the throne room, which was, empty at this time of day. As hecity does need a king, though. Have you considered that?''Like a fish needs a . . . er . . . a thing that doesn't work underwater, sir.''Yet a king can appeal to the emotions of his subjects, captain. In . . . very much the same way as you did recently, I understand.''Yes, sir. But what will he do next day? You can't treat people like puppet dolls. No, sir. Mr Vimes always said a man has got to know his limitations. If there was a king, then the best thing he could do would be to get on with a decent day's work—''Indeed.''But if there was some pressing need . . . then perhaps he'd
you've learned a lot from Cap— Commander Vimes, captain.'
'Sir. My father always said I was a quick learner, sir.'
'Perhaps the think again.' Carrot brightened up. 'It's a bit like being a guard, really. When you need us, you really need us. And when you don't . . . well, best if we just walk around the streets and shout All's Well. Providing all is well, of course.'
'Captain Carrot,' said Lord Vetinari, 'because we understand one another so well, and I think we do understand one another . . . there is something I'd like to show you. Come this way.'
He led the way into the throne room, which was, empty at this time of day. As hecity does need a king, though. Have you considered that?''Like a fish needs a . . . er . . . a thing that doesn't work underwater, sir.''Yet a king can appeal to the emotions of his subjects, captain. In . . . very much the same way as you did recently, I understand.''Yes, sir. But what will he do next day? You can't treat people like puppet dolls. No, sir. Mr Vimes always said a man has got to know his limitations. If there was a king, then the best thing he could do would be to get on with a decent day's work—''Indeed.''But if there was some pressing need . . . then perhaps he'd
Monday, May 4, 2009
Cao Yong KOI POND
Cao Yong KOI PONDCao Yong GIRL WITH MUSICIANCao Yong GARDEN SPLENDOR
your real nose,' said Carrot. 'Thank you.'
The clown wound down a little.
'I think you'd back. 'You've been very helpful.'
He folded his hand again.
'Come on,' he said. 'We'd better begoing. I don't think we're going to be popular here in a minute or two.'
'What was that you showed him?' Angua asked, as they proceeded with dignity yet speed towards the gate.
'It was something you came here to find, wasn't it? All that stuff about better go,' he said. 'I don't like this sort of thing. It upsets me.''Sorry,' said Carrot again. 'It's just that . . . I think I'm having an idea. I wondered about it before . . . and I'm pretty certain now. I think I know about the person who did it. But I had to see the eggs to be sure.''You saying another clown killed him?' said Boffo belligerently. ' 'Cos if you are, I'm going straight to—''Not exactly,' said Carrot. 'But I can show you the killer's face.'He reached down and took something from the debris on the table. Then he turned to Boffo and opened his hand. He had his back to Angua, and she could not quite see what he was holding. But Boffo gave a strangled cry and ran away down the avenue of faces, his big shoes flip-flopping hugely on the stone flags.'Thank you,' said Carrot, at his retreating
your real nose,' said Carrot. 'Thank you.'
The clown wound down a little.
'I think you'd back. 'You've been very helpful.'
He folded his hand again.
'Come on,' he said. 'We'd better begoing. I don't think we're going to be popular here in a minute or two.'
'What was that you showed him?' Angua asked, as they proceeded with dignity yet speed towards the gate.
'It was something you came here to find, wasn't it? All that stuff about better go,' he said. 'I don't like this sort of thing. It upsets me.''Sorry,' said Carrot again. 'It's just that . . . I think I'm having an idea. I wondered about it before . . . and I'm pretty certain now. I think I know about the person who did it. But I had to see the eggs to be sure.''You saying another clown killed him?' said Boffo belligerently. ' 'Cos if you are, I'm going straight to—''Not exactly,' said Carrot. 'But I can show you the killer's face.'He reached down and took something from the debris on the table. Then he turned to Boffo and opened his hand. He had his back to Angua, and she could not quite see what he was holding. But Boffo gave a strangled cry and ran away down the avenue of faces, his big shoes flip-flopping hugely on the stone flags.'Thank you,' said Carrot, at his retreating
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Filippino Lippi Allegory
Filippino Lippi AllegoryBartolome Esteban Murillo A Girl and her DuennaCaravaggio The Incredulity of Saint ThomasGeorge Frederick Watts Watts Choosing
hand clamped on to the dwarf's head and Detritus pushed Cuddy behind him, but then the figure was running, running . Men. It's you that'd be the fool if you resist arrest.'
'Oh? I'm under arrest?'
'Only if you don't come with us . . .'
The Patrician was in the Oblong Office, staring out of the window. The multi-belled cacophony of five o'clock was just dying away.
Vimes saluted. From the back, Vetinari looked like a carnivorous flamingo.
'Ah, Vimes,' he said, without looking around, 'come towards them, still firing.Detritus blinked.Five more shots, one after another, punctured his breastplate.And then the running man was through the open door, slamming it behind him. 'Captain Vimes?'He looked up. It was Captain Quirke of the Day Watch, with a couple of his men behind him.'Yes?''You come with us. And give me your sword.''What?''I think you heard me, captain.''Look, it's me, Quirke. Sam Vimes? Don't be a fool.''I ain't a fool. I've got men with crossbows
hand clamped on to the dwarf's head and Detritus pushed Cuddy behind him, but then the figure was running, running . Men. It's you that'd be the fool if you resist arrest.'
'Oh? I'm under arrest?'
'Only if you don't come with us . . .'
The Patrician was in the Oblong Office, staring out of the window. The multi-belled cacophony of five o'clock was just dying away.
Vimes saluted. From the back, Vetinari looked like a carnivorous flamingo.
'Ah, Vimes,' he said, without looking around, 'come towards them, still firing.Detritus blinked.Five more shots, one after another, punctured his breastplate.And then the running man was through the open door, slamming it behind him. 'Captain Vimes?'He looked up. It was Captain Quirke of the Day Watch, with a couple of his men behind him.'Yes?''You come with us. And give me your sword.''What?''I think you heard me, captain.''Look, it's me, Quirke. Sam Vimes? Don't be a fool.''I ain't a fool. I've got men with crossbows
James Jacques Joseph Tissot Too Early
James Jacques Joseph Tissot Too EarlyHenri Rousseau Woman Walking in an Exotic ForestHenri Rousseau warHenri Rousseau Two Monkeys in the Jungle
YOU. 'Hright,' said Sergeant .Colon, 'this, men, is your truncheon, also nomenclatured your night stick or baton of office.' He paused while he tried to remember his army days, and brightened up.'Hand you will look after hit,' he was a pause while they picked up Corporal Nobbs and patted him on the back until he settled down.
'Very well,' said Sergeant Colon, 'what you must do now is take your truncheon like so, and on the command one, proceed smartly to Harthur and on the command two, tap him smartly upon the bonce. Hwun . . . two . . .'
The truncheon bounced off Arthur's helmet.
'Very good, only one thing wrong. Anyone tell me what it was?'
They shook their heads.
'From behind,' said Sergeant Colon. 'You hit 'em from behind. No sense in risking trouble, is there? Now you have a go, Lance-Constable Cuddy.'
'But sarge—'
'Do it.'shouted. 'You will eat with hit, you will sleep with hit, you—'' 'Scuse me.''Who said that?''Down here. It's me, Lance-Constable Cuddy.''Yes, pilgrim?''How do we eat with it, sergeant?'Sergeant Colon's wound-up machismo wound down. He was suspicious of Lance-Constable Cuddy. He strongly suspected Lance-Constable Cuddy was a trouble-maker.'What?''Well, do we use it as a knife or a fork or cut in half for chopsticks or what?''What are you talking about?'
YOU. 'Hright,' said Sergeant .Colon, 'this, men, is your truncheon, also nomenclatured your night stick or baton of office.' He paused while he tried to remember his army days, and brightened up.'Hand you will look after hit,' he was a pause while they picked up Corporal Nobbs and patted him on the back until he settled down.
'Very well,' said Sergeant Colon, 'what you must do now is take your truncheon like so, and on the command one, proceed smartly to Harthur and on the command two, tap him smartly upon the bonce. Hwun . . . two . . .'
The truncheon bounced off Arthur's helmet.
'Very good, only one thing wrong. Anyone tell me what it was?'
They shook their heads.
'From behind,' said Sergeant Colon. 'You hit 'em from behind. No sense in risking trouble, is there? Now you have a go, Lance-Constable Cuddy.'
'But sarge—'
'Do it.'shouted. 'You will eat with hit, you will sleep with hit, you—'' 'Scuse me.''Who said that?''Down here. It's me, Lance-Constable Cuddy.''Yes, pilgrim?''How do we eat with it, sergeant?'Sergeant Colon's wound-up machismo wound down. He was suspicious of Lance-Constable Cuddy. He strongly suspected Lance-Constable Cuddy was a trouble-maker.'What?''Well, do we use it as a knife or a fork or cut in half for chopsticks or what?''What are you talking about?'
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Vincent van Gogh The Yellow House
Vincent van Gogh The Yellow HouseLeonardo da Vinci Virgin of the RocksLeonardo da Vinci St John the Baptist
stared woodenly at the wall.
He ought to be people, greatest of cities on the Discworld, located on either side of the river Ankh, a waterway so muddy that it looks as if it is flowing upside down.
And visitors say: how does such a big city exist? What keeps it going? Since it's got a river you can chew, where does the drinking water come from? What is, in fact, the basis of its civic economy? How come it, against all probability, workshappy, he told himself. And he was. In a way. Definitely. Happy as anything.He was going to get married in a few days.He was going to stop being a guard.He was going to be a gentleman of leisure.He took off his copper badge and buffed it absent-mindedly on the edge of his cloak. Then he held it up so that the light glinted off the patina'd surface. AMCW No.177. He sometimes wondered how many other guards had had the badge before him.Well, now someone was going to have it after him. This is Ankh-Morpork, Citie of One Thousand Surprises (according to the Guild of Merchants' guidebook). What more need be said? A sprawling place, home to a million
stared woodenly at the wall.
He ought to be people, greatest of cities on the Discworld, located on either side of the river Ankh, a waterway so muddy that it looks as if it is flowing upside down.
And visitors say: how does such a big city exist? What keeps it going? Since it's got a river you can chew, where does the drinking water come from? What is, in fact, the basis of its civic economy? How come it, against all probability, workshappy, he told himself. And he was. In a way. Definitely. Happy as anything.He was going to get married in a few days.He was going to stop being a guard.He was going to be a gentleman of leisure.He took off his copper badge and buffed it absent-mindedly on the edge of his cloak. Then he held it up so that the light glinted off the patina'd surface. AMCW No.177. He sometimes wondered how many other guards had had the badge before him.Well, now someone was going to have it after him. This is Ankh-Morpork, Citie of One Thousand Surprises (according to the Guild of Merchants' guidebook). What more need be said? A sprawling place, home to a million
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